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Showing posts from April, 2011

Mother moment

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She's lying so peacefully sound asleep in my mother's arms, her tiny chest rising and falling to the rhythm of her little breaths. I'm entranced, watching her intently but afraid to touch her like she were a priceless museum treasure. "Take her," my mother whispers. "Put her in the bassinet." I fight through the wave of inadequacy that moves over me, take a deep breath and stand up to take her. My hands are awkward, shaking slightly as I attempt to manouver her into my chest. Immediately she looks startled and starts to look upset, obviously sensing the panic and inexperience in my trembling hands. Her blanket bunches and I can feel her feet are exposed and I instinctively move her downwards to try and protect her tiny toes from frostbite despite the summer breeze. She's like jelly in my arms as her snugly wrapped blankets start to unravel and she looks like she's about to cry. I'm trying to keep her wrapped yet it seems as though I'm on…

new mommy on the block - tidbits

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growing up already. baby lili has been home for a week today, she'll be two weeks old tomorrow and she is already growing so quickly. She's stronger and more alert and aware of things, everyday she has new expressions and she's developed quite an appetite! Cliche to say this after being a parent for just under two weeks but it's amazing how quickly they grow!

pink. we've tried and failed miserably to avoid dressing her in pink. this is owed to the fact that we got so much pink stuff from family and friends. so she has been sporting pink polka dots, pink stripes, pink onesies, pink gowns and is quenching her thirst drinking from pink bottles.

breastfeeding. it's is no joke. no seriously, the first few days, i felt like my nipples had been put through a shredder.  phew. i'm certain breastfeeding this is an ancient torture tactic.

baby blues.  for me it was an overwhelming sense of "am i going to be able to do this?". it was a series of questions "…

A letter to my daughter

Dearest daughter,
Today you are three days old. Just three days and you’re already the greatest blessing I could ever have received. I thank the Lord for bringing you into mine and your Dad’s life, and my only prayer now is that we will spend many, many, many more days sharing our lives together. We named you "Lili’uokalani" after the last reigning Queen of Hawaii who is a celebrated songwriter with a thirst for knowledge to celebrate where your Dad and I met as music loving students at the University of Hawaii. She also wrote one of my favorite Hawaiian songs – “Aloha Oe” which for me quite aptly describes how we both feel about you. Your middle names Jeannette Milaneta Moliei are the names of your grandmothers. All women whose love and wisdom has been a blessing and an example to me. And if there is anyone whose love for you contends with mine, it’s theirs.
I face the prospect of raising you with both fear and excitement. The responsibility of shaping your life is daunting…

Meet my darling

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Lili'uokalani Jeannette Milaneta Moliei Va'ai Tinitali  Born on April 5, 2011 at 10.41pm Birthplace: LBJ Tropical Medical Center, American Samoa Weight: 8lbs 8oz Height: 51 cm
My labour was a blinder (26 hours active labour followed by c-section) but all and any pain I endured (more on THAT later) is eclipsed by the thanks and joy I feel that she arrived to me safely in one complete breathing parcel of perfectness. 
You may be wondering why I am blogging instead of breastfeeding or changing dirty diapers or losing sleep one way or another, well, baby is currently in the Nursery Intensive Care Unit under observation. They picked up that she was breathing a little too quickly on her first day and they've kept her in for observation. They haven't detected anything serious but they will be having a chest x ray today just to be sure. I am trying to be patient and remind myself that it's better if they keep her in a few extra days and then we take her home in perfect health th…